Contemplating Meditating, Part 1

Undefinitions

“Can someone tell me what budgeting is?” I was at a retreat for new missionaries learning about financial…ness and stuff. I raised my hand and said, “I..can tell you what it’s not!” We all laughed and I proceeded to give my un-definition according to my experience.

I provided a definition in the intro to this series, but let me give you an undefinition of meditation.

There aren’t a lot of ways to go wrong in meditation, which is one reason I love it. However, I make sure it’s not about me criticizing myself. We get that enough from everywhere else, why spend the next five minutes or hour reciting negative self-thoughts and scripts to myself?

During meditation negative self-thoughts will come up. Be aware of them, and instead of agitating yourself with it, hold the thought and ask yourself,

“Why do I think this?”

“In what ways is it true? And how can I extend some grace to myself in this area?”

“Do I need to be more aware of this day to day?”

“In what ways is this untrue?”

This will be a very hard task. That’s ok. The most common negative self-thought will be, “I can’t sit still”, “I can’t keep my mind from wandering during practice”…and that’s ok.

What it Looks Like

How does one meditate…exactly? Great question. The answer? I have don’t have just one. I’ve read a lot of great books about it.

The best example I can give you is this:

It’s a moment where while the world scurries along, you choose to sit in stillness and quietness. You allow any and all of your thoughts to surface one by one, not holding on to one or the other for too long. It’s about allowing certain emotions you haven’t had time for to come up so you can ask yourself, “What’s causing me to feel sorrow, why was yesterday such a joyful day-what about it made it so good?”

And it doesn’t have to be complicated. Allow every thought to surface. Even if it’s “I love hearing babies giggle like that one this morning” or “Man, I need to do laundry asap” or total silence within your thoughts.

You Try

Take five minutes in a quiet space today-at lunch, before bed, in the morning, whatever works for YOU. Allow thoughts to come and go.

“Somewhere we know that without silence words lose their meaning, that without listening speaking no longer heals, that without distance closeness cannot cure”-Henri Nouwen

Contemplating Meditating, Intro

‘medi-tat-ion (med-uh-tay-shun) (n): to focus one’s thoughts on; to reflect on or ponder

According to Meriam-Webster, meditation comes from the Latin as meditatus which can be traced to mederi, which meant to remedy.

I loved learning this. The act of meditation is a known remedy, or aid against stress, anger, chaos, depression and other illness. It improves the immune system, the nervous system, the limbic system, the digestive system, respiratory system and can enhance your five senses, which help you engage with your world on a deeper level.

And this contemplative practice doesn’t just help your body, but your mind and spirit as well. It aids in good decision making, in recovering from or managing anxiety and depression, and can help you in your journey of spiritual discovery.

I’ve seen first hand the affects of meditation-when I practice and when I don’t-and even though it can get a bad rap, I want to help others discover this simple tool to aid in every day living.

I won’t be writing about a meditation formula that will fix your life. And I can’t write about the perfect way of meditating, because we’re all different and unique, but I’ll be glad to give suggestions to help you find your own routine. Our bodies, minds, and spirits have different needs, and I hope you’ll find you’re able to meet some of those, leaving you feeling refreshed and calmed as we battle the daily chaos of our lives.

Greet Me at the Gate

Can you reach me, Providence, in my distance,

Or must I tread the emptiness and reach you in yours?

Must I lie still as dawn waiting for you to cross my ocean

Or is it I who needs to step on the waters, hoping they sweep away and I can find you?

Do I have to wait to hear you,

Or shall I lean in.

And must I search a thousand sands to find you

Or cross my thousandth cracked desert?

Will you reach through and penetrate your skies

Or am I waiting to learn I have wings?

Greet me at the gate, I with my meal in hand, my hair displaced, and fingernails which harbor dust and dirt, and walk with me to my labor.

The Night I Tried to Fix Corporate

"So, then, the issues are coming from the top? Like a federal government not giving the states enough liberty to make their own choices?"

I was discussing the inner workings of the business world with one of my managers, fascinated at how human development affects business development.

"Yes, but there are also issues from the bottom. People make a much bigger deal of things than they really are. Plus, there's a ton of lack of communication."

"Sooo...what can I do to fix it? How can I help floor staff communicate better with management and vice versa, and then, management better with corporate?" (Classic Katy comment).

"Don't become the mediator. First, it's not your problem to fix. If people complain to you about management, that's their job to confront the issue. You can't own others' responsibilities to speak up for themselves. Second, there's a chance that you could get burned from both sides."

This guy had been at the top of the top a decade earlier, living in the cut throat world of CEOs, making six digits, only to realize he had lost the thing that meant the most: his relationship with his family.

I've never taken his seldom words lightly. And these stuck with me.

"Man, you're right."

I realized yet again the multi dimensional importance of boundaries. It's my belief that if leaders would realize their limitations yet focus on their gifted areas, their businesses could be more fruitful. But this takes self awareness and the excruciating pain of letting go of certain areas we don't have the skill/time for. In doing this, we open up an opportunity for creativity from someone else who has the time and skill to offer to that position.

And if we could be ok with not being super(wo)man, and hand over the things, though precious to us they may be, growth could develop.

But how many leaders do you know spend time for themselves, to get to know themselves better, or take care of themselves more (rest, vacation, etc)? And not just business leaders, but church leaders, parents (leaders), etc.

Not many. So this is my simple plea: take care of yourself. When you do this, you are taking care of your marriage. You are taking care of your children. You are taking care of your corporation. Because, all of these systems you're a part of, they won't have to take care of you for you.